© Jay Foreman 2010
F
If you put a gun to my head
E
And make me pick a celebrity...
Dm
Please hear me when I sing
I know it's a horrible thing
C
To wish on anybody
F
But if I had to pick one
E
out of every celebrity,
Dm
Well, having paused and reflected
I'm sure you'd have selected
Gm C
The same one as me.
F7
I remember what I thought of her this time last year
And I feel that way still.
Bb
Don't tell me you had any sympathy for her
Gm7 C
Before she was ill.
F
With a hand on my heart
E
It's a tragic thing to occur
Dm
But if somebody's capers
Are removed from the papers
C
I'm glad it was her.
F
This time next month or next year
E
I'll still recoil at her name.
Dm
The basic role she fulfills
And her parenting skills
Gm
Will be mostly the same.
F7
Mark my words, when she finally goes
There'll be only words of praise.
Bb
She'll be "simple and brave" instead of stupid and racist
Gm7 C
For several days.
Dm
I know it sounds cruel
F Am
But I challenge any one of you to admit
Gm
That when you heard the news
Bbsus4
You didn't hold back a smile
C F F6
Even just a little bit.