lyrics by Jay Foreman and Laurel Foreman
music by Jay Foreman
capo 1st fret
C7, B7, Em
Can I interest anyone in my sofa?
It's cheap but it requires some extra care
It gets rather sweaty between the cushions
So be sure to keep it clean down there
Sorry about the rash from where I've been sitting
And the blisters from where I spilt bolognese
By the way, it's not normally this hairy
I've not shaved it now for several days
And if you do decide to wax it
Please exfoliate to avoid ingrowing hair
And leave the curtains closed or it'll get a sunburn
Peeling everywhere.... ooh it's got a nipple
It will keep you warm like no other sofa
But it comes out in goosebumps when it's cold
All stains come right out with soap and water
Not too bad for eighty nine years old.
And don't sit there for too long
Or you'll get a puddle underneath your thighs
I hope somebody takes it
I don't want to know what happens when it dies.
Skin sofa, skin sofa
Eurgh eurgh eurgh eurgh
Eurgh eurgh eurgh eurgh.